Proverbs 14
1 The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish tears it down with her own hands.
In a biblical home, the man is the head and the woman is second-in-command.
It is not so easy to be second-in-command, especially when you are more capable and have greater skill than the one in command. Great wisdom is needed to be second-in-command.
Since you are not in command, you have to know how to deal with your own ego when you are second-in-command. You have to know how to treat the one in command with respect even if and when you don’t think that he deserves that respect. You have to know how to hide his faults from the outside world. You have to complement him and fill in where he lacks. You have to do things for which the credit goes to him. You have to accept that some of his bad decisions will make things hard for you.
Don’t forget that you put yourself in this situation because you chose the person you will marry. If you didn’t choose, that was your first mistake.
Will you continually criticize the one in command, and thus tear your house down?
Will you get so depressed that you are unable to function, and thus tear your house down?
Will you deftly bring up past failures of the one in command, and destroy his confidence, and thus tear your house down?
Being second-in-command is a humble position, and it takes great skill to walk it well. Don’t underestimate the task. Yet, know that God is watching you and is rooting for you to do an awesome job at it. See that you don’t disappoint Him.
2 He who walks in his uprightness fears the LORD, but he who is devious in his ways despises Him.
To fear the Lord means to do things that He loves. To displease the Lord is to do things that God hates.
A man who is devious in his ways is a man who says one thing when he means to do another. He pretends to be your friend when he is actually rooting for your failure. He flatters you in your presence but speaks ill of you in your absence. An upright person is the opposite of all these.
There is nothing better than having God be happy with you. Nothing! For that reason alone, it is best to always be upright instead of devious.
3 In the mouth of the foolish is a rod for his back, but the lips of the wise will protect them.
The way a wise man speaks is very different from the way a foolish man speaks.
When a foolish man speaks, the words that he utters can be used to find fault with him. On the other hand, the words of a wise man will protect him from fault finders.
For example, suppose you ask a person, “What do you think of Anna?” If that person responds by telling you bad things about Anna, he has put himself in a position where you can tell Anna what he said, and get him into trouble with Anna. But if he responds with a neutral answer, such that you cannot get him into trouble with Anna, without getting himself also in trouble with Anna, then he has protected himself.
There are lots of people out there who cannot be trusted, and who will ask you pointed questions about things you should not be talking about, just so that they can quote you and get you into trouble. So then, we have to be careful. Don’t say anything that you wouldn’t want proclaimed to the whole world. Learn to be comfortable with not answering a question, or saying, “I don’t want to answer that question.” Why not just say, “I don’t think that my thoughts on this matter are relevant at this point in time and space.” Sometimes, a simple, “I don’t know,” or “I have nothing to say about this,” is the safest answer.
4 Where no oxen are, the manger is clean, but much revenue comes by the strength of the ox.
Understand that when you set out to do anything of value, you will have all kinds of obstacles and have to deal with all kinds of issues. To do something wonderful, you have to work with many technologies and many types of people. Perhaps you could do it all yourself, but that would not get as much done as working with great technologies and great people. Just understand that while there is a price to pay to bring in great technologies and great people, their contributions can make the difference between failure and success, and between mediocrity and great success.
5 A trustworthy witness will not lie, but a false witness utters lies.
Do you want a friend who tells you the truth or lies?
If a friend lies to others, then when the conditions require it, he will also lie to you.
Nobody wants to deal with liars. Therefore, if you want people to work and play with you, be a person of integrity – someone who doesn’t lie to anyone. It is better to be honest than to look good in the eyes of others.
6 A scoffer seeks wisdom and finds none, but knowledge is easy to one who has understanding.
A scoffer is someone who doesn’t accept truth even if it smacks him in the face. As a result, there are problems he cannot solve, because he doesn’t have the truth required to solve it. On the flip side, if someone understands the truth, it is easy for him to get the knowledge to solve problems that require that truth.
For example, if you understand that the earth is a sphere rotating around its axis, and revolving around the sun, and has its axis inclined to its plane of revolution, then you can know why there is day and night, why there are years, and why there are seasons. But if you scoff at those who tell you about the rotation, revolution and inclination of the earth then you will be hard-pressed to explain days and night, years and seasons.
In the same way, when it comes to spiritual things, for example, if you scoff at God’s warnings about imbibing alcohol then you will never understand why your life is a mess and why you can’t keep a job and why your bank account is sparse.
7 Leave the presence of a fool, or you will not discern words of knowledge.
If you want to know what is 2+2, and you ask a hundred people for the answer, if you get a hundred different answers you will not be able to discern which answer is true (unless you already knew the answer). For the most part, these fools who answered you didn’t know what they were talking about. People love to pretend to know, and to give you an answer.
If you want knowledge, hang out with those who know, and who are willing to explain why they arrived at that answer.
8 The wisdom of the sensible is to understand his way, but the foolishness of fools is deceit.
What do you do when your behavior is not up to the mark? Do you cover it up and make it appear that you were up to the mark, or do you try to examine yourself and understand why you were not up to the mark, and then figure out how to do things different the next time so that you will be up to the mark?
The wise person seeks to read and understand God’s Word to know how to behave, and then to understand why he behaved in a certain way, and what to do to behave better. The fool, on the other hand, tries to cover up his mess and deceive people into thinking that he did alright.
The wise person is more interested in getting things right, whereas the fool is more interested in looking good in the eyes of others.
9 Fools mock at sin, but among the upright there is good will.
When you are a part of a team, what is your attitude towards others? Do you wish the best for them, and rejoice when they do well? That’s what an upright person does.
The fool, on the other hand, treat sin lightly. When they don’t pull their share of the team’s work, and it is brought to their notice, instead of being contrite, the try to make it appear as if they didn’t really mess up too badly after all.
10 The heart knows its own bitterness, and a stranger does not share its joy.
When you are sad, no one (except God) can really fully sense how you feel. Therefore, you can’t really depend on them to make you feel better. You have to know how to fix your problem yourself. That is why having the wisdom to fix things is valuable.
On the flip side, when you are joyful, the person sitting next to you, who doesn’t know you, can’t experience that joy with you to the extent that you experience it. But you can share it with God.
11 The house of the wicked will be destroyed, but the tent of the upright will flourish.
The wicked cheat and steal and build houses, but they won’t last.
The upright works hard and has little money because they didn’t cheat or steal. As a result, they can only afford a tent, but God is with them, and therefore their tent will flourish.
12 There is a way which seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death.
Many thoughts appear in the mind of a man, but if those thoughts are not aligned with God, then those thoughts will lead to death. Those thoughts may seem perfectly sensible to the man who thinks them, but he doesn’t quite know how the world operates and what the future holds.
For example, a man sees a beautiful woman and pursues her and marries her. He forgets to evaluate her character. Only after he has tied the knot does he realize that she is like a heavy stone that drags him to the bottom of the river.
Similarly, a woman sees a handsome man, or a dashing man, or a man who pays attention to her, and she gives her heart to him. She sees some flaws in him, but she optimistically thinks that she will be able to change him after marriage. To her surprise, after marriage, not only does he not change, but he gets worse, and all the niceness that he displayed before marriage has flown away.
Let God choose for you, for we don’t know people, and we don’t know the future, and we don’t know so much more, whereas God does.
13 Even in laughter the heart may be in pain, and the end of joy may be grief.
People hurt easily and often. They just don’t show it. Just because someone appears to be happy it doesn’t mean that they are really happy. The secret of being happy at all times is still a secret to most people. Therefore, if you feel down, and think that everyone else around you is doing well, it is most often not so. Also, if you learn to be discerning you will be able to see the subtle hints that indicate when a person is down even when they laugh and joke, and maybe you will be able to say a kind word to them to help them feel better.
Sometimes, people are happy at the start of the day, or at the start of an event. But invariably, something happens, and it turns their joy to grief. If and when this happens to you, take the time to reflect upon what happened, and why your feelings changed. It will help you to know yourself better – you will learn what brings you joy, and what makes you sad, and then think about how you can adjust your thinking so that the next time that same events, or set of events, doesn’t take you down.
When you are down, you are less effective for God, and you are more susceptible to temptation. That is why you need to learn to deal with things that bring you down.
14 The backslider in heart will have his fill of his own ways, but a good man will be satisfied with his.
A backslider is someone who begins to do things – sinful things – that he once gave up.
If you backslide, you experience the past pleasures of sin, but there is regret after that. On the other hand, a good man – one who goes forward instead of backward – learns to relish doing good things instead of sinful things, and for him there is no regret, but satisfaction.
15 The naive believes everything, but the sensible man considers his steps.
When we are young, we tend to believe whatever people tell us or lead us to believe. In other words, we are naïve. Now mind you, simply believing is not necessarily a bad thing – it is a great thing to simply believe God (because God cannot lie). However, since men lie, it doesn’t bode us well if we simply believe everything a man tells us – even if that man has a reputation of being a godly man. Jesus never entrusted Himself to anyone because He knew what was in man.
Therefore, be sensible, and consider your steps. That is, don’t even believe what your own mind tells you. For example, your mind may tell you, “This person did this bad thing to you, be angry with him, and take your revenge.” Don’t believe your mind; rather, believe God who commands us not to take our own revenge.
16 A wise man is cautious and turns away from evil, but a fool is arrogant and careless.
When you see temptation approaching, the wise thing to do is to avoid it whenever you can. It is arrogance to think that you will be able to handle it unscathed. It is careless to not consider that you may fall and thereby incur damage.
Why do young men and women fall into addictions like drugs, smoking, drinking and harlotry? It is because they think that they can handle it, or that it will not do them harm. Don’t be like them. Be cautious, and turn away from these, and many other, things that have brought many down.
17 A quick-tempered man acts foolishly, and a man of evil devices is hated.
People are bound to do things to upset you. You can count on that happening. How should you handle that? With great patience! If you show your anger right away, you don’t take into account that those who have done something to upset you may have a very good reason to do so – a reason that you cannot immediately comprehend. Therefore, if you show your anger, you will end up making a fool of yourself. So then, before you blow off your top, calmly ask some questions, and give them a chance to explain themselves. You may find that they have a perfectly good reason for their behavior.
If you are a person who resorts to underhandedness to get your way, the people you take advantage of will hate you. One day, they will band together to do you in. Don’t think that you will get away. I’ve seen powerful men, who exploited woman for many years, until one day some brave woman brought her story to light, and then suddenly, many other women brought similar stories to light, and that man was destroyed.
18 The naive inherit foolishness, but the sensible are crowned with knowledge.
When people tell you something, do you accept it blindly, or do you see if what they say is sensible? Do you check their story for inconsistencies and contradictions?
Most of the people I’ve met don’t do this. Someone tells them to celebrate Christmas or Easter, and they do it. Someone tells them to tithe, and they do it. Someone tells them to cover their hair, and they do it. Someone tells them to believe something about God, and they do it. They don’t go to the Bible to find out whether these things make sense from God’s point of view. Such people inherit foolishness. On the other hand, those who check things for sensibility receive true knowledge of God.
19 The evil will bow down before the good, and the wicked at the gates of the righteous.
Right now, many good people are forced to bow before evil people, because in this world evil people have power. But a time will come when things will be set right, and evil people will be subservient to good people. So don’t let what you see now make you an evil person, for what you see now is only temporary.
20 The poor is hated even by his neighbor, but those who love the rich are many.
A poor person is one who doesn’t have enough and depends on you for something or the other. People are inherently selfish, and want to receive rather than give. Therefore, they don’t like the poor because they have to give to the poor, but they love the rich because they can receive from the rich. It is important to understand that this is how things are in the world.
This is not how you should be though. Like Jesus, you should understand that it is more blessed to give than to receive. So then, don’t be selfish and hate the poor. See the next verse.
21 He who despises his neighbor sins, but happy is he who is gracious to the poor.
If you despise your neighbor (because he is poor) you sin. Instead, you should do what you can to help your poor neighbor.
22 Will they not go astray who devise evil? But kindness and truth will be to those who devise good.
In the many years that I’ve worked in the corporate world, I’ve seen people who don’t like to see other people become successful. If they see people rising, they try to pull them down. They will downplay those people’s successes, or try to discourage those people from pursuing lofty goals. Such people will go astray, but those people who have a good attitude when they see others succeed will experience kindness, and will truly understand what is needed to be successful. You succeed when you are happy to see others succeed.
23 In all labor there is profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty.
As you walk through life, you will see that there are some people who merely talk about getting things done, whereas others actually get things done. You should be among the latter, for the latter has value. Also, as far as possible, don’t team up with those who merely talk.
24 The crown of the wise is their riches, but the folly of fools is foolishness.
While some people acquire riches unscrupulously, there are many who acquire riches through wisdom. If you take the time to understand how things work, you can make money – lots of money. On the flip side, if you foolishly waste your time entertaining yourself and giving in to your desire for pleasure then you will not be rich.
So then, make it a point to go to school and university, and to read and understand how the world works, and use your mind and your hands to work hard and make money.
25 A truthful witness saves lives, but he who utters lies is treacherous.
Are you the type of person who tells lies to defend those who are wrong or to profit financially? God hates such people. So then, tell the truth and save from punishment those who have done nothing wrong.
26 In the fear of the LORD there is strong confidence, and His children will have refuge.
27 The fear of the LORD is a fountain of life, that one may avoid the snares of death.
How can you ensure that all your hard work will bear fruit? How can you ensure that things will turn out well for you in the end? How will you ensure that you will escape the traps that ensnare the sons of men?
If you seek to always do what is pleasing to God, you will avoid the snares of death, and you can be confident that everything will turn out well for you in the end.
For example, when God says to speak the truth, do it to please Him.
28 In a multitude of people is a king's glory, but in the dearth of people is a prince's ruin.
29 He who is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who is quick-tempered exalts folly.
We all tend to think that we are wise and sensible people. But what is a good test for whether you are such a person?
Here is one simple test: are you slow to anger, or are you a quick-tempered person? When people mess up, especially in your home or the place where you are in charge, how do you react?
Don’t just blast those who mess up. Take time to find out why people mess up and see if there is a way to fix the root cause. Consider overlooking an involuntary or accidental or occasional mess up.
30 A tranquil heart is life to the body, but passion is rottenness to the bones.
What do you do when other people get angry? Does your anger rise up quickly too because you are such an emotional or passionate person, or are you a person with a tranquil heart?
Train yourself to deal calmly with other people’s anger.
31 He who oppresses the poor taunts his Maker, but he who is gracious to the needy honors Him.
A needy person is a person who lacks something. That ‘something’ may be money, or social graces, or good sense, or beauty, or intelligence, or athletic ability, or whatever. Handicapped people are needy too.
There are many needy people all around us. Don’t laugh at their expense. Don’t make fun of them, in public or in private. Don’t take advantage of them. Don’t taunt them.
Why not do these things? For one simple reason – God made them!
Learn to see each person as the handiwork of God, and for just this reason, treat each person with deep respect, and help them in their time of need. In doing so, you will make God look good, and God will treat you with favor.
32 The wicked is thrust down by his wrongdoing, but the righteous has a refuge when he dies.
When we are young, we think that we will live forever. But as we grow older, we realize that death is inescapable. So then, what’s your plan B? That is, what’s your plan for life after death? Who will stand by you then?
If you’ve lived righteously, pleasing God, then God will stand by you. But if you’ve been a wicked person, you’ve got no plan B, and that is not a good idea.
Don’t wait until you are old to realize that you need a plan B. Many foolish people blow away their teenage years doing all sorts of foolishness. Don’t be like them. Make a habit to keep God on your side from early on.
33 Wisdom rests in the heart of one who has understanding, but in the hearts of fools it is made known.
When you understand how things work, you can get things right again and again, and not just occasionally.
When you don’t understand things at all, you will get things wrong again and again, and everyone will watch you and know what not to do.
So then, gain understanding before you jump in. For example, if you want to date someone, take the time to learn the traps inherent to dating. If you want to get married, read up about what it takes to have a successful marriage. If you want to have children, learn the necessary wisdom to bring them up well. Don’t just dive in and hope it will all work out right – that is foolish.
34 Righteousness exalts a nation, but sin is a disgrace to any people.
As an individual, you can do right, and it is good for you. When many people do right, the entire nation becomes a great force of righteousness, and such a nation will do extremely well on the global scene.
On the other hand, if many people in the nation are corrupt then the entire nation suffers severely.
35 The king's favor is toward a servant who acts wisely, but his anger is toward him who acts shamefully.
Wherever you work, you will typically have a boss. If you know your job and do it well, your boss will be willing to do all kinds of things that are favorable to you, and this is what will open up doors for you. The wisdom that you get from God is very helpful even in the workplace.
|